Thursday, January 1, 2009

Karl Rove confronts Obama in one on one impromptu exchange

Saturday, December 27, 2008

King of Thailand loses bet, must wear silly hat for another year!

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

A Song of Thanksgiving



Uncle Dave's Grace

by Lou and Peter Berryman



Thanksgiving day, Uncle Dave was our guest
He reads the Progressive which makes him depressed
We asked Uncle Dave if he'd like to say grace,
A dark desolation crept over his face

"Thanks," he began as he gazed at his knife,
"To poor Mr. Turkey for living his life
All crowded and cramped in a great metal shed
Where life was a drag then they cut off his head"

"Thanks," he went on, "for the grapes in my wine
Picked by sick women of seventy-nine
Scrambling all morning for bunch after bunch
Then brushing the pesticides off of their lunch

Thanks for the stuffing all heaped on my fork
Shiny with sausage descended from pork
I think of the trucks full of full of pigs that I see
And can't help imagine what they think of me"

Continuing, "I'd like to thank if you please
Our salad bowl hacked out of tropical trees
And for this mahogany table and chair
We thank all the jungles that used to be there

For cream in our coffee and milk in our mugs,
We thank all the cows full of hormones and drugs
Whose calves are removed at a very young age
And force-fed as veal in a minuscule cage"

"Oh thanks for the furnace that heats up these rooms
And thanks for the rich fossil fuel it consumes
Corrupting the atmosphere ounce after ounce
But we're warm and toasty and that is what counts

I'm grateful," he said, "for these clothes on my back
Lovely and comfy and cheap off the rack
Fashioned in warehouses noisy and cold
In China by seamstresses seven years old

"And thanks for my silverware setting that shines
In memory of miners who died in the mines
Worn down by the shovelling of tailings and piles
Whose runoff destroys all the rivers for miles

We thank the reactors for our chandelier
Whose deadly plutonium won't disappear
For hundreds of decades it still will be there
But a few more Chernobyls and who's gonna care?"

Sighed Uncle Dave, "though there's more to be told
The wine's getting warm and the bird's getting cold"
And with that he sat down as he mumbled again
"Thank you for everything, amen"

We felt so guilty when he was all through
It seemed there was one of two things we could do
Live without food, in the nude, in a cave,
Or next year have someone say grace besides Dave.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Confusion on the campaign trail as Obama
shakes baby and kisses hands

Monday, October 6, 2008

Palin announces new "flexible" approach to
No Child Left Behind Act —"OK, so maybe a few"

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Barney Frank finally straightens necktie to bipartisan acclaim

Friday, September 19, 2008

McCain advisors announce at economic summit: "Everything is just fiiiine!"